Cairo, the 29th March, 2010

Are you good at selling yourself?!


Most of the dancers/teachers I know in the world area of Oriental Dance take a big deal of time dealing with marketing and publicizing themselves as the Masters of the World. I am not against it. Some of these teachers are my friends and I respect them for their human and artistic value or even for their commercial smartness (which I do not possess).

I fail on not promoting myself.
I fail on admitting my ignorance more than all I already know and achieved.
I fail on focusing totally in my artistic development and not caring about publicizing myself and all I do.
I fail on not calling myself STAR of this and that. I leave those names to others.
For me, there are no stars except the ones you see in the sky. There are only artists who also happen to be human and, therefore, are striving to learn and reach totality by all means.

I don't call myself the best or the master of I don't know what.
I don't brag about my success and I don't kiss the derrieres of the ones who could put me on the spotlight.
I fail, I know.

And yet I cannot manage to find more interest in the commercial side of Oriental Dance than in its artistic side.
Nothing is worth my attention more than a great show where me and my musicians do not seek perfection BUT TOTALITY. Being total is a concept I cherish. And to be total, ALL your energy has to be concentrated in the music, dance, energy between you and your audience.

No time to promote myself or even to say : Damn! I am good!
By the time a great show is over and the audience is still clapping, I am already searching for new answers and dealing with the weak spots of the evening.

What can I do better?
Was I 100% in the moment?
Did I do too much? Too little?
Did I REALLY connect with my orchestra and my audience?
Did they feel me?

These questions will not be heard by anyone. They reside inside of my head, my heart and soul.
These questions will not promote me as the greatest dancer in the world but these are the thoughts that give meaning and direction to my artistic life.

And this is my life.