Cairo, the 14th August, 2009

“Mahmoud, Mahmoud, Mahmoud”

*** My dearest friend, teacher, grandfather, companion and dance/soul partner. You are eternal in my heart.

*** Another blessed afternoon with my favourite partner:
my dear friend Mahmoud Reda!
No one shares dance and art with me like Mahmoud and I cannot measure the amount and real importance of all that he kindly, patiently teaches me. So much more than dance and art. So much more than any other teacher has ever taught me. Above all, the generosity and the humbleness that only the great ones can possess…and then an incredible attention to all that I do, correcting me, watching me as I learn his new choreography or any piece of dance I ask him to teach me. Watching me as if I was the work of art and not his own work. No one has ever looked, really looked at me this way. So much tenderness and appreciation. I can only do my best. For me, for him, for the dance itself that we both love so much.

*** “There´s a new dance I want to show you!” – My dear teacher tells me with a wide smile full of anticipation as soon as I arrive at his studio.
“Yalla! I want to learn it. Show it to me.” – I answer literally jumping on the ground like a kid at a Christmas present opening ritual.
What comes next can only be described as MAGIC. We close ourselves in the dancing studio and he unravels, step by step his new creation asking me, every once in a while, if I like it (how could I not like it?!)

*** He´s sitting on his chair watching me repeat sequences of steps again and again. I presume it´s painful for him to watch me doing the same stuff one and one more time…I am mistaken.
I am a perfectionist and I hate copies. I wish to transform that new material into my “own” dance in a second and I give myself no time to memorize. I want to see it perfect and sublime from the first moment we dig into the new dance.

*** His patience amazes me. I say I´m sorry. Let me repeat one more time and another and another until it´s presentable.
My dear friend tells me to take my time. More important than that…he gives me that time watching me repeat and repeat the same steps like a maniac trying to feel the music, get it into my system, understand it and own it. All in an extremely short space of time.

*** I feel bad to make him wait for my persistent repetitions and my stubborn idea that I have to make it perfect, every single step full of meaning, life´s juice, soul…

*** “Are you upset that I correct you?! I know you´re not used to be corrected. You´re the one who, usually, corrects others. Are you upset?!” – He asks with some shyness.
“Correct me all you want. That´s why I´m here for. Every correction, every movement I´m forced to do in a different, unknown or unexplored way is a gift for me. Without difficulties, there´s no growth. Keep correcting me as much as you want. I thank you for that.” – I answer him, although I secretly think there´s not even reason for him to question how much I appreciate all he´s teaching me.

*** Mahmoud keeps telling me how much he enjoys watching me dance, no matter how many times I may repeat the same dance sequence. Is that any greater compliment than my friend´s total attention and appreciation?!

*** His brand new choreography (what an excitement!), Nubian dance, a new “tableau” I´m preparing from one of his old songs, “Mwashahat” with a song that breaks my heart every time I listen to it (“Ah,ya k´albi” sang in classical arabic and once performed on television by Farida Fahmy).
I ask him to put it on the stereo. From the moment I listen to the first notes of the song, my tears start to descend from my eyes into the emptiness where only our heart can live.
“See how absolutely beautiful is this song, Mahmoud!” – I say to my friend trying to disguise the tears on my face.
My breath stops at every melodic change. I point these out to Mahmoud and I know he understands me better than anyone. Only someone like him could ever understand why I cry while listening to a melodic change in some old song most people don´t even remember anymore.

*** “I have to do this song in my work. My musicians will keel me. This is hard work for them but I just have to do it. It´s too beautiful to remain undone…” – I tell my friend.
He nods and tells me: “Of course.”
*** If I could freeze these moments, I would. Thank you, God!