Cairo, the 22nd August, 2009

“1st Official Day of Ramadan or the true meaning of “CHASING THE WIND”

The day started more peaceful than usual. It’s the first day of Ramadan, after all.
There was an unusual silence pouring down from the bluest sky I’ve ever seen in such a long, long time. I had breakfast with a friend and then followed to my gym already enjoying the atmosphere that announces the fasting, the family gatherings and the spirit of piety characteristic of this season.
The preparations for this sacred month have been changing the city’s – the country’ s- rhythm for quite a while and, even if you’re not a muslim, you end up wrapped up into the season’s spirit and participating in it.
Egyptians are, per nature, very flexible, open minded people towards each person’s religious choice.
Being agnostic or atheist is, probably, the only thing that will turn a smiley face into a reproachful, terrorized face. Arabs and Egyptians don’t understand or assimilate the remote possibility of someone “not believing” in God. If you’re a mentally sane human being, then you MUST believe in God. The way you express it is not so much of a big deal (although muslims tend to consider their religion the finished, perfected truth and Mohamed the last and ultimate prophet) and you’ll be welcome in people’s hearts if you’re a Christian, a Buddhist or even a Jew (although Jews and all related to Israel doesn’t gather much sympathy in Egypt, actually most Egyptians hate Israelis…complicated matter). What people will not accept is that you breath and eat like everybody else on earth and you don’t believe in God!

Being an Islamic country – despite the relative freedom of religious practices and choices – it’s expected that everybody follows a bit of Ramadan. If not by choice, at least by imposition as all the services, commerce, personal and professional matters will be conditioned according to the fasting hours and the “iftar” (the first meal of the day, the “fasting break”).

As I left my friend – after what it seemed to be a very blameful meal in front of an already starving staff at the coffee shop- I couldn’t stop myself but wonder if, at least during Ramadan, sexual harassment and general lack of respect from men towards women in the streets of the city will stop or diminish.
In Ramadan, people are not only supposed to fast (no food or drink from sunrise to sunset) but they should also abstain from smoking, having sex or acting upon it in any way, think or utter negative words to anyone, steal, lie, etc…you name it. Human beings who are, during all the year, used to do all the worst things any wicked mind can imagine, suddenly feel compelled to be “ angels”…

Does this work for real?!
I’m checking this one up! It may be one of my biggest personal dramas around here and Ramadan time is the last and most resourceful test of Egyptian men’s mind:
Are they able to respect their own religious season? Will they stop acting like stray animals for a month and turn their heads (and private parts) to God or will they confirm the impression (my own impression) that hypocrisy is stronger than religion?!
Will men have shame on their faces during Ramadan? Will I be able to walk freely in the street without being disturbed and offended in my condition of a woman?!
Anxious to answer these questions…We’ll see.

Beautiful 1st detail of Ramadan:
My Egyptian assistant dropped by my home to offer me a platter of food. A tremendous Egyptian food feast that she cooked for her family and wanted to share with me.
Rice and “bahmia” (very traditional in Egypt), Alexandrian kidney, salad, soup, “mahshi” (one of my favourites in Egyptian cuisine!) and a couple of sweets I cannot identify.
The thing is she’s so poor and I know she manages her money in a hard day-to-day basis. I was too busy minding my own life and matters to offer her food and she wasn’t. So… how much can we learn from each other and how humble should we be when we know that, often, the poorer are the RICHER and the richer are, indeed, the POORER?!
I felt a bit ashamed (I have to buy her a generous plate of the best sweets…on my to do list!) and so touched by her gesture. This is one of the bright sides of Egypt and a big reason why I love this country so much. When you least expect it, people surprise you with gestures full of love and generosity. If only we could learn from each other and stop thinking each religion is better/worse than the other?!

1st Amazing experience pre-Ramadan:
Yesterday, I was dragged by another friend to join an African community religious ritual in Maadi
(Maadi Community Church). I’m always up to discover something new, observing, opening up to different perspectives and, allas, understanding others and myself in a deeper, wider sense.
I’m not a church person and I was raised listening to my mum and grandfather badmouthing the pope and its luxurious Vatican full of corruption and lies (Muslim and Christian churches have been homecoming “really” bad people as their priests, sheiks and rulers for way too many centuries…).

I went to the church on Christmas eve to eat the “cookie” the priest gave to the people (the “hostia” symbolizing the body of Christ) and only taken by my grand-grand mother who was as pious and God fearing as everybody else in her time. My mom thought it was all a theatre and I totally agreed with her.
I personally watched as priests would steal, sexually harass girls during the religious services (including me!) and all that made see churches with a suspect, dreadful look. When I criticize most of the muslim rules (so many of them outdated and against the nature of human beings), I am also criticizing the rules and hypocrisy of Christian church as I know it of any other church that doesn’t contribute for people’s health and happiness.

Curiously enough – and as a symbol of Egypt’s flexible approach to other religions – the ritual was taken in an open space in a beautiful villa of Maadi surrounded by muslims getting ready to start their own Ramadan.
Now…I hate rules. I hate someone or something ordering me and telling me what to do, what to think, say or believe or…how to behave. I see relationships with God as a PERSONAL matter and every prayer, every act regarding it should come from inside of yourself, not from an exterior source who imposes it upon you. THIS HOW I THINK.
Don’t tell me when to say “Amen”. Please don’t tell me to adore God and demonstrate it following this or the other ritual. When it comes from the heart – and from your free will and consciousness – it means SOMETHING to me and, I suppose, to God (whatever that ENERGY may be).

So here I go half participating and half observer to a mess of the “Maadi Community Church” and I must say I had a blast!
Music and singing, “gospel” style celebrating a God WHOM IS NOT NEGATIVE, FINGER POINTING or SAD. This is a HAPPY GOD for HAPPY PEOPLE!
Most of the rhythms from the religious service were familiar to me as I grew up within the African community in Portugal and the mood they instilled in the present audience was just amazing.

Music and dance are, once again as I mentioned 10000 times, incredible ways to connect with your inner self and GOD WITHIN you. This image of a God that is watching you and blaming you for your human weaknesses never quite convinced me. I believe in a GOD that lives INSIDE you. Part of you. Flesh of your flesh and blood of your blood (does this come mentioned in the “Bible”?!).
That’s what I believe. No temples or images needed. HE’S inside you. If you could just listen to HIM all the time…that’s the path to enlightenment, isnt’t it?!
There was a preacher between dance and music gospels and from that one I retained two gorgeous notes:

1. The history of the famous king Solomon who gathered an incredibly luxurious fortune, endless lovers, wives, concubines, the most lavish palaces and richness available in the material world to end up feeling utterly empty and recognizing about his quest for material success in this world :
“I WAS CHASING THE WIND”.
Living in a world that tells you’re nothing unless you own this and that, unless you do this and that, unless you’re successful at this and that…it’s an Herculean feat to clearly see that all those material achievements we struggle so much for are nothing but …THE WIND.

2. The story of Jesus washing a poor man’s feet at a dinner occasion when all the disciples refused to intervene and do it themselves.
This is a simple, incredible story and it deeply touched my heart.
There was a dinner party where Jesus and his disciples were present and everybody took their own shoes (leaving them at the door, as it was customary during those times) and washed their feet before entering the room where the banquet was going to take place.
When a poor man arrived and his feet had to be washed, Jesus watched as every one of his disciples refused in their full pride and sense of superiority to go down on their knees and wash the man’s feet so he did it himself as to show them that serving others doesn’t diminish one’s worth (quite the opposite, really…).
Master= Servant

This is, probably, the most eloquent proof of humbleness and human kindness.
According to Arabic traditions and extremely defined hierarchies, there are superior and inferior people. The boss doesn’t serve his employee. If my “khadama” (the lady who cleans my home) sees me helping her doing her work (as it happened so often) she will look at me with disapproval and loose her respect for me (meaning I am lowering myself right into her own low standard).
Pride and arrogance are much of Arabic behaviour nowadays as far as hierarchies are concerned. A master cannot be a server, according to the daily attitudes I observe in most Egyptian and arabs.
I am totally against this ignorance based system and totally agreeing with this Jesus history of the “feet washing” (sorry if I don’t name it properly).
My mum – my reference in most of my values – always showed us (me and my sister) that honest work cannot be shameful. From washing a bathroom to writing a book. From cleaning the streets or emptying the garbage to governing a country or being an artist. If you work and serve with dignity, there’s no shame in it.
Only apparent, transitory conditions separate us from each other but, in essence, we’re ALL the SAME. ALL ONE.

Humbleness and giving to others unconditionally are, besides and above all, signs of WISDOM.

READINGS for the season:

"A life time of peace", Essential Writings by and about Thich Nhat Hanh

"The source of a true smile is an awakened mind."

- Thich Nhat Hanh

Another jewel of buddhist, I would say humanist knowledge. Anyone who wishes to be a better version of himself/herself should read this book.

In a time like Ramadan, we should all reflect not upon different religions but the daily attitudes and thoughts that build a better world, better human connections, a better quality of life.

Buddhism seems to be one of the most intelligent philosophies -ways of living - I've ever been in contact with and this book reflects it.

Beautiful.

" Understanding Arabs", by Margaret K. Nydell

This title seems to be simplistic but the book itself isn't.

Generalized information about different aspects of Arabic culture and mentality explained in a fair, multi-sided and well documented way. A great tool to understand people's different attitudes and inputs in the Arab World (something that, as far as I'm concerned, drives me crazy so often) and a tender, realistic way to recognize that, in fact, western and eastern people are educated and conditioned in such different ways by their own societies, genes and traditions that it's no wonder we clash when in interaction.

This books was a great "deep breath" for me. Although it didn't say anything I haven't experienced first hand, it made me understand better this culture I'm living in and be more tolerant towards the things I cannot fully grasp and accept.

I am the foreigner here, after all...and I may seem as alien to arabs as they seem to me. Touche!

I totally advise this book to anyone who's interested in arabic culture and mentality issues.