Hmmmm...smells like bullshit.

It really does.

When, in a space of two weeks, I am requested to perform at the party of two Saudi businessmen "visiting Cairo".

The first one was fishy enough. Private party at the businessman´s recreational villa with request for two hours of show, non stop.

The business would be made through an egyptian "employee" and I was requested to perform without my orchestra, which I declined without blinking.

Then the second one came a few days later in the same shape and smell*. One of the "employees" also requested names of egyptian dancers who I could recommend as the secret "saudi business man" wished for "variety".

I am not an empresario and it is not my job to recruit dancers for private parties but I suggested the name of one from whom I happened to have the contact.

One of the clients (maybe the same client with two "employees" trying to get comissions as high as possible from this fishy gig) accepted my proposal of performing my standard show WITH my orchestra and the other insisted I would go alone. No deal for the second - no way I would put myself in the private home of a saudi businessman performing God knows WHAT* by myself - and firm grip on the first.

He complained, he insisted the client wanted only me, no musicians and me explaining and hitting him on the face: ONLY with my orchestra present.

I was, kindly, informed that - due to my stubborn position - I was not longer requested for this *job. An egyptian dancer was found for it.

If my sharp sense of smell doesn´t fail me this is a case of dirty, cheap BULLSHIT: rich guys from oil countries come to Cairo on professional or recreational basis and want to "have some fun" in a city much more permissive than their native places so they invade the "street of Pyramids" for its 5th cathegory night-clubs (drugs, alcohol and prostitutes on the menu, VERY religious INDEED) and hire prostitutes "disguised as dancers" for some private horizontal **entertainment.

My first reaction to both requests - which I am inclided to believe were for the same client - was NO. Then, I thought it over and wished to get over my own prejudices. Not ALL saudi men are looking for prostitutes. Not ALL private parties for business men are pip shows. I had just performed at a private party and the environment and audience were AMAZING. Of course, they were a DECENT, sweet egyptian family but and not a saudi business man in town but, hey, if I fight against other people´s prejudices, I should face and fight my own.

Against my own sense of smell - upps...I meant: better judgment - I said YES with the condition of having my orchestra and personal assistant with me. In that case, I would be safe and backguarded as "my men" are my royal protectors, as well as musicians and co-workers. In case any monkey business was intendend towards me, not only would I have a group of well armed and scarred, Shobra and Sayeda Zeinab neighbourhood guys assuring my escape as well as the pleasant sight of rich, big tummy, arrogant guys getting kicked in their asses by my musicians/bodyguards. I wouldn´t mind watching THAT* movie, said the devil in me.;)

The result was, I am afraid to admit, less than desirable: it was fishy. It was...well...for the lack of a better word... bullshit.

This next wednesday, an egyptian "dancer"** (it takes two** to tango, baby/habibty...) will be doing a peep show for a bunch of saudi men "looking for fresh meat". For some reason, I don´t know if I should laugh or cry.

When, oh WHEN, will people be straight and call the sheeps by their REAL name?!

Ok, now repeat after me:

The sun is yellow, the sky is blue. I know an asshole and that asshole is you.

When looking for a DANCER, ask for a DANCER.

When looking for a PROSTITUTE, ask for a PROSTITUTE.

Quite simple, isn´t it? You may also leave the toilet seat down after doing your personal service,thank you very much.

Calling things by their name is not so rude as hiring ARTISTS for prostitute´s jobs.

Got it*?