Fragility and vulnerability - not weakness (two completely different subjects) - have always seemed two of the most obvious qualities of STRONG people. I´ve observed how the fake strength (often disguised into aggressivity and desire to dominate, oppress and humiliate others) of so many "apparently strong" individuals turned to dust when compared with the TRUE and ONLY strenght of the KIND, VULNERABLE, OPENLY FRAGILE human beings that dare to face the storms face to face (and still keeping their open and warm hearts alive) and move ahead despite them or even BECAUSE of THEM.
Since I launched my career in Egypt I´ve started to learn the POWER of USING ANGER, INJUSTICE and ATTACKS in my favor. Being STRONG started to mean: taking advantage of all obstacles, evilness, random or purposed disasters that crossed my Path.
Since then, I learnt the rare and precious ART of turning OBSTACLES into OPPORTUNITIES and ROCKS thrown at me into WINGS I could fly higher than any of my enemies could imagine possible.
The first time I heard an ex-boyfriend say "that dance you love so much is shit" was a turning point in my Life as well as all the other times I heard egyptians and arabs comment on how all dancers are prostitutes and Oriental Dance - THEIR OWN DANCE - is not an Art but just a female seducing tactic (only acceptable when performed by a wife to her husband in the privacy of their bedroom).
My heart broke into a million pieces; my soul was scattered all over the grounds of every cemetery in the world; I was devastated. Of course I had an idea of how poorly Oriental Dance was still seen in the world - particularly in the Arab-Muslim world - but having someone so close to me throw such an offense and ignorance to my face was more than I thought I could bear. From that first bomb an inner, higher, wiser STRENGTH came from inside of me and MADE THIS PROMISE: I WILL PROVE THESE IGNORANT-CAVE MEN WRONG!
And by God, I did. I still do.:)
That same ex-boyfriend also threw at my face that I would never have a performing contract in Cairo - unless I turned myself into a prostitute (which he is sure all dancers are despite working with them and pretending to respect them). When I presented him my first contract in Cairo - achieved on my own and with so much merit - he looked down at the paper (ready to spit at my face) and asked me "who did you sleep with in order to get this contract?!"
Then again there were HUGE fights, physical and emotional agressions, offenses no woman could ever deserve to receive and a yet BIGGER anger and sense of injustice that propelled my career into a SUCCESS no one - except me and God - could have imagined. I was once more - literally - on the floor and ready to JUMP HIGHER and HIGHER - an impulse that is still here with me in this moment.
Loads of OBSTACLES, INJUSTICES, SEXUAL HARASSMENT, DISAPPOINTMENTS and IGNORANCE came my way since then. It was obvious that - in order to thrive - I would have to learn more than just dancing. I had to learn how to make lemonade out of the toughest and most unsavory lemons.
From all the lemons I´ve gathered extra ENERGY and CONVICTION to accomplish my dreams and, specifically, to PROVE ALL THOSE ASSHOLES WRONG BY BEING MYSELF - and nothing less than my best self - AND BUILDING A CAREER BASED ON THE OPPOSITE OF EVERYTHING THEY TRIED TO CONVINCE ME ABOUT:
Oriental Dance can be an ART FORM, dear ignorants.
A Dancer who does not sell herself can be successul, dear ignorants.
No, this dance is not just a private pip show any common wife does to her husband.
And yes: you threw rocks at me and you underestimated my character, intelligence, strenght and talent but I made you all shut up by being ALL THAT I AM TODAY. Thanks to you!:) Never underestimate the power of anger and injustice: human beings are able of miracles you - from your little own frustrated minds - cannot conceive.
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